WORDS TO PLAN BY

HOARY PLANNING APHORISMS - PLANNING PHILOSOPHY - DOGGEREL

Things I have learned as a City Planner and Marine and Boy Scout and in Sunday School.

Don't worry, be happy.  

Why Plan, when you can react?

As you climb the ladder of success, don't forget who helped you.

Any road will do when you don't know where you are going.

This too shall pass.

Get it done.

Think!

Think positive.

Life has its ups and downs.

It will get better.

The Seven "P's" Of Planning  - Preliminary Prior Planning Prevents Pitiful Poor Performance

Poor Planning on Your Part Does not Necessarily Constitute an Emergency on Mine

Positive Mental Attitude is a Force Multiplier.

Don't make mountains out of mole hills.

What good does getting depressed do?

Dive right in.

Take bite size projects and finish them.

Make a decision and stick with it.

The longest journey begins with a single step.

Excuses are like belly buttons, everyone has one.

I am from the government and here to help.

Close enough for government work.

If anything can go wrong, it will.

If it ain't broke don't fix it.

         But a stitch in time saves nine.

Run spiell chek.

Travel more.

Eat Less.

If it tastes good, spit it out.

Keep plugging away.

Swing for the Fences but try not to strike out.

Stuff happens.

Just do it.

Can do easy.

Criticism, like sewage, runs down hill.

Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

Damn the Torpedoes, Full speed Ahead!

Don't Lose Friends Over Politics

In America we elect a Republican or a Democrat, pretty good people. We are not choosing between a Communist and a Fascist.

It is always darkest before the dawn.

It is always darkest before it is pitch black.

When in danger, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

"We spend precious hours fearing the inevitable. It would be wise to use that time adoring our families, cherishing our friends, and living our lives!"  Mary Angelou

Be Prepared.

Do a good turn daily.

Good guidelines then and now - A Scout is Trustworthy, Loyal, Helpful, Friendly, Courteous, Kind, Obedient, Cheerful, Thrifty, Brave, Clean, and Reverent.

On your Honor, Do your Best, Do Your Duty, For God and Your Country.

Leave your campground better than you found it.

Leave your community better than you found it.

If like many planners you are disorganized, find someone who is organized to help you.

Checklists help but they are not the bible.

A Plan is Not the Bible, amend as needed.

Search for the Win / Win.

Developers are important to your community.

Seek and Ye Shall Find.

Planning, like life, has its ups and downs.

It will get better / It's got to get better / I hope it gets better.

Brevity is Beautiful.

KISS - Keep it Short and Sweet.

Short Plans are Best.

Your long plan should have a short summary.

Don't make mountains out of mole hills.

Life can be a can of worms.

Publish or perish.

The longest journey starts with a single step. 

Keep plugging away.

Muddle through.

Take bite size projects and finish them.

Make a decision and stick with it.

Keep your eye on the ball.

Planning does not equal procrastination.

Trend is not Destiny

Current Trends May Not Forecast the Future.

If I don't know the answer I will make something up.

Keep your friends.

Don't be a workaholic.

How many people on their deathbed say, "Gosh, I wished I had worked more?"

The Few, the Proud, The Marines.

The Few, the Careful, The Planners.

Building consensus among governments and people is like herding Cats.

Show me which way the people are going and I will lead them.

2016 Zimbabwe 

Planning Chicago's third airport is like bathing an elephant - it is big, difficult, and you can definitely get hurt.

Excuses are like belly buttons, everyone has one.

Grant me the COURAGE to change what should be changed; the SERENITY to accept what cannot be changed; and the WISDOM to know the difference.

We will all hang together or all hang separately.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

But pay attention to details - other people are.

Let criticism roll off your back.

Do what your boss tells you unless it is illegal or immoral.

Flee Fornification, or, Don't get caught.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell.

Most of your life is none of their business.

Socrates was a famous Greek Philosopher. Like many planners, he was always telling people what do do..............          They poisoned him.

When you take a job, you are issued some marbles. Each time there is a problem one marble is taken away. No new marbles are ever added for any reason.  After a while, you lose your marbles.

When in danger, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

Hostile public hearings are stressful but they seldom shoot real bullets.

The Planner is like the Marine Point Man - he leads from the front, gets shot at often, and sometimes gets dinged.

When it absolutely, positively has to be destroyed overnight - Call 911-Marines.

Great Leadership enables the Marines to get American teenagers up at 0500 hours, work out, stay clean and neat and organized, and Charge Machine Guns, all for minimum wage.

Yea though I walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I will fear no evil, because I am a US Marine and there for the baddest guy in the valley.

To err is human, to forgive divine - neither of which is Marine policy.

The height of windy braggadocio obnoxiousness - a Marine from the Windy City.

Stop me before I Plan again.

Covid-19 - Wear Masks, Keep Your Distance, Hide Out. This Too Shall Pass

I am tired of Covid. I want to insult and demean it.  I will now call it the Cooties!  Don't get the cooties.

After                                                                    Before

ACDC - Acronym Code Decode Center

PANE - People Against Nearly Everything

FUBIJAR - Flip You Buddy, I'm Just A Reserve

FUBIJAC - Flip You Buddy, I'm Just A Consultant

FUBAR - Flipped Up Beyond All Recognition 

WITAWTAW - Where There's a Will, There's a Way

NIMBY - Not In My Back Yard

NIMTOF - Not In My Term Of Office

BANANA -  Build Absolutely Nothing Anywhere Near Anybody

REMF - Rear Echelon MF

SUCKS - Snarky Unfair Churlish Kid Stuff

DUDE - Developer Under Delusions of Entitlement

TICS - This Is Complicated Stuff

ISC - I Stand Corrected

MMOM - Making Mountains Out Of Molehills

DWBH - Don Worry Be Happy

DAT - Developer Adjustment Tool (My Marine knife on the wall)

PIHEFF - Planning Is Hard, Especially For the Future

FASU - Forecasts All Screwed Up

PIOOTA - Pulling It Out Of The Air

The Plan

The Plan

In the beginning, there was a plan,

And then came the assumptions,

And the assumptions were without form,

And the plan without substance,

And the darkness was upon the face of the workers,

And they spoke among themselves saying,

"It is a crock of shit and it stinks."

And the workers went unto their Supervisors and said,

"It is a pile of dung, and we cannot live with the smell."

And the Supervisors went unto their Managers saying,

"It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong,

Such that none may abide by it."

And the Managers went unto their Directors saying,

"It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide by its strength."

And the Directors spoke among themselves saying to one another,

"It contains that which aids plants growth, and it is very strong."

And the Directors went to the Vice Presidents saying unto them,

"It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."

And the Vice Presidents went to the President, saying unto him,

"This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigor

Of the company With very powerful effects."

And the President looked upon the Plan

And saw that it was good,

And the Plan became Policy.

And this, my friend, is how shit happens.